sports day yest was a bore.

i've nvr in my whole life not take part in a single event during sports day! damn.

i was darn disappointed that council girls had to pull out last min just because we did not have even runners. i was confident we had the chance of even getting like 2nd or 3rd. ARH.

forget it. my hopes of getting a trophy for a momento for my 2yrs of SAJC are dashed.

haf to aim for College Day Awards now! 3distinctions! haix. abit difficult. haha.

but other than the council boys relay, which we came in champs! that was a great race ran! so proud of them. the rest was a bore to me. yucks. i shld not have gone in the first place. i wasn't feeling well. but i wanted to go becuase it's the last sports day. and i felt it was only responsible of me to go though i was unwell than to withdraw and let them die finding a replacement. it just shows no sportsmanship la. haiyar whatever.

but i enjoyed the lunch! like ALOT! went Cartel with ian, kenneth, kanesh, jean, teenesh, dan, and sam. and we had a damn gd time laughing at kenneth and kanesh. the ACT GAY couple. gosh! i'll try to get the photos from kanesh soon! (:

other than that. that day was a waste of time.

today was even worse.

it was like the most unlucky day of my life!

YUCKS.

but oh wells. i'll get over it very soon i guess.

aiyar. i had too many things happening to me at one go. couldn't really handle it. but nvm. i grow in the process.

i am finally facing reality.
i am finally out of my dream land.
out into the cruel and heartless reality.
where sincerity no longer matter as much to many.
where everything is not just what it seems.
where everything just seem so superficial.
where everything just crops up suddenly & expect u to face it.
where everybody wears a mask. including myself.
where everybody has a hidden self.
where everybody seem too busy to care.
we are slaves who are going mad in this crazy world we live in.
we have absolutely no choice but to pick ourselves up again when we fall & walk on.
no matter how tormenting it might be.
i miss living in my dreams.
i don't know how long i can last.
i might crumble. like apple crumble. HAHAH..
but i feel that i'm strong enuf to not crumble that easily.
but i am tired. i really am.
i've nvr felt like this before. this tiredness. it makes me break.

but of course. the everybody above is just a generalisation.

i'm glad i also have pple beside me to pull me up when i fall.
to hold my hand when i break down.
to hug me when i need it.
to encourage when i'm disheartened.
to just be there always no matter what.

i thank God for these few very special ones. for without them. i really will just collapse or explode or something. haha. i appreciate hugs i've received as well. i really do.

When you're safe inside your room you tend to dream
Of a place where nothing's harder than it seems
No one ever wants or bothers to explain
Of the heartache life can bring and what it means

Now in a world where innocence is quickly claimed
It's so hard to stand your ground when you're so afraid
No one reaches out a hand for you to hold
When you look outside look inside to your soul